


I (Don't) Want to Complicate You

by aintitfun



Series: like a river flows [4]
Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Fan Encounters, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Genderqueer Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-31
Updated: 2014-08-31
Packaged: 2018-02-15 12:45:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2229462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aintitfun/pseuds/aintitfun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tyler always likes meeting fans after shows, but this one is... different.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I (Don't) Want to Complicate You

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Far Too Young To Die by Panic!

Tyler and Josh ran backstage as the houselights illuminated their exhausted fans. Tyler was convinced it was their best show yet. “Dude that was so sick! I loved the way your skirt looked like a parachute when you jumped off of your piano. I bet those pictures are gonna be awesome.” Josh grabbed Tyler’s shoulders and shook them with excitement.

 

Tyler just smiled as he gripped his phone in his hand. He was deep in thought, but still conscious of his surroundings. _I just wore a skirt onstage._

 

 _“_ Ty, we’ve gotta get showers now if you want to talk to people before we go.”

 

“Hmm? Oh, yeah, I’ll be there in a second.”

 

Josh sensed the younger man’s hesitation. “You were great tonight. Try not to overthink it.” Josh patted his friend on the back and headed for the bathroom. Tyler nodded, pausing momentarily before trailing behind him. 

 

Tyler pulled off his skirt and folded it neatly, sitting it next to Josh’s pile of clothes. In the shower, he rested his head on the cold tile wall. Tyler absentmindedly traced the scars on his thigh as he felt the water run over him. _I’m okay. This is okay. Why do I feel upset?_  Josh’s water had stopped running and Tyler snapped back to the present.

 

“Tyler? Are you still in there?”, Josh questioned as he ran a towel through his hair. 

 

“Yeah, I’m almost done. Just gimme a second.” Tyler quickly washed himself down and got out of the shower. Josh was sitting on the bench on Tyler’s necklace. “Oh, I didn’t realize you were still in here.”

 

Josh looked up with a smile. “Nah, I wanted to wait for you.” Josh handed his bandmate the necklace. “I thought this might make you feel better.” Tyler took it in his hands and saw the new charm that had “they/them” printed on it. Tyler bit his lip and clutched the necklace. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to choose one or the other.”

 

Tyler flung his arms around Josh and embraced him in a tight hug. “Thank you so much J. I really needed this.”

 

“Of course.” Tyler’s towel hung precariously on his hips as he clung to Josh. “Uh buddy, I love you and all, but you should probably get dressed.”

 

“Oh right, sorry.” Tyler laughed nervously and put their necklace on. 

 

———————

 

Tyler peeked outside and saw the line forming next to the bus. They reached to tuck in their necklace in their shirt and Josh placed a hand on theirs. “You don’t have to hide, you know. I’m sure they’ll understand.”

 

Tyler brought their hands down and twitched. “Yeah. Yeah, you’re right.”

 

“You ready to head out there?”

 

Tyler took a deep breath and closed their eyes. “Yeah, I’m good. Let’s do this.”

 

————————

 

The line wasn’t too long, which Tyler was grateful for. It was all the same things they heard every night. “I love you. You saved my life. You’re my hero.”, but it felt different this time. They felt somewhat guilty for not officially “coming out” as gender fluid. 

 

A young boy, who looked abut 9 or 10 bounced excitedly on his toes as he stepped up to meet the band. “Hi Tyler! Hi Josh! I’m Colin!”

 

Josh smiled, “Hey, it’s nice to meet you. Your hair is awesome dude.” He gestured to Colin’s blue bangs.

 

“Thank you! My dad let me do it for the concert.”

 

Josh laughed.“You’ve got a cool dad!”

 

“Dad, Josh said you’re cool!” Colin yelled over his shoulder. Colin’s dad waved from the side as Colin beckoned him to come over. 

 

“Colin, please lower your voice buddy. You’re standing right next to them.” Colin’s dad said in a hushed voice.

 

“Woah!” Colin reached for Tyler’s necklace and they flinched. “Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot. He looked up at his dad. “Ask before you get into someone’s personal bubble.”

 

“He has trouble remembering that sometimes.” He wrapped his arm around his son’s shoulder and patted his chest. “Calm down bud.”

 

“But the necklace! It looks like the one I want.” Colin turned to Tyler. “You looked super awesome in your skirt tonight. I want to wear one, but my mom won’t let me. She told me I could paint my nails instead. See?”

 

Tyler smiled shyly. “They look really nice.”

 

“Can I talk to you for a moment?” Colin’s dad asked Tyler. They pulled away from Colin and Josh as the boys practiced a secret handshake. “I know it’s strange that I’m more nervous than my kid, but uh, you’ve been a big help to him lately, He’s just been going through a lot at school with kids picking on him. First it was because of his ADHD and now it’s because of the hair and nails. I know he’s… gender fluid, but I don’t think he knows what that means.” Tyler blinked rapidly at the familiarity of his words. “Anyway, I just um, wanted to say thanks for being true to yourself. I know it’s hard, but you seem a lot happier. I’m just so grateful that Colin has someone like you to look up to.” 

 

For the first time in a longtime, Tyler was speechless. They ran their fingers through their hair, trying not to cry. “I-uh… that means a lot. Thank you. You’re an amazing parent and Colin is really lucky to have you.” Colin’s dad stuck his hand out for a shake. Tyler grabbed it, but still went in for a one armed hug instead. 

 

“Aw you got to hug them before me?” Colin pouted and crossed his arms.

 

Tyler laughed and bent down in front of the young boy. “Bring it in here Buddy!”

 

Colin ran into the hug and held on tight. “You’re the best.” It was the first time Colin had spoken softly during their interaction. Tyler could tell he was completely genuine in his words. 

 

——————

 

“Hey Tyler, your mom called.” Mark handed their phone to them. 

 

Tyler furrowed their brow. “Is everything okay?” His mom normally didn’t call after a show unless it was an emergency. 

 

“Yeah, I think she just wanted to talk to you. She was looking through the tag on instagram…” Mark awkwardly tapped his knuckles together. “You did tell her, right?”

 

Tyler’s eyes got wide. “Shit.” They made their way to the back room as they attempted to mentally prepare for the backlash from their mother. 

 

“Hello?”

 

“H-hey mom. Mark said you called?” Tyler twisted their finger in their hair as they spoke. 

 

“Oh Tyler, why didn’t you tell me?” Her voice was soft and loving. Tyler knew that she cared but they didn’t expect that reaction. 

 

“I was scared. I barely understand it myself. I thought you would abandon me or be ashamed. I didn’t want to lose you. I can’t lose you.” Tyler rambled as they held back their tears.

 

“Sweetheart, I would never, ever do that to you, You’re my child and it is my job to love you no matter what. Can you make it your job to be honest with me?”

 

Tyler spoke through their tears. “Yeah, yeah I can do that. I’m sorry mom. I was just scared.” 

 

“Josh told me about your relapse. He didn’t tell me what it was about.” Tyler felt their heart race. They had tried to forget all about it. “If things are getting bad again, you know you can come home.”

 

Tyler shook their head. “No, I’m fine now. It was just a mistake." They heard their mom slowly exhale. “Mom?”

 

“I”m still here. I’m just… worried.” Tyler’s mom wrapped the phone cord around her index finger. 

 

Tyler sighed, “I’m really sorry. It was just a momentary lapse of judgement. I promise it won’t happen again. Josh has been keeping a close eye on me.”

 

“Can you tell me what triggered you?”

 

Tyler groaned at the memory of their dream. “I had a nightmare. You and dad turned your backs on me. I just couldn’t handle the thought of losing you.”

 

“Sweetie, I promise I will never do that to you. Next time, can you just call me instead?”

 

Tyler smiled, “Yeah, I can do that. I was just scared.”

 

“Aw Ty, it’s okay. I had a feeling, but I didn’t want to mention it until you told me yourself.”

 

Tyler wiped their face with the sleeve of their hoodie. “Wait, you knew?”

 

Tyler’s mom chuckled. “I notice everything. I saw the necklace Josh gave you. Oh, and your sister wants her nail polish back.”   

 

“Ah, yeah sorry about that. I’ll give it back next time I’m home. Does she know that I’m…” Tyler hesitated. They still didn’t have a label that really fit. 

 

“We all know, but we don’t know. You know?” They both laughed at the ridiculousness of her statement.

 

“Yeah, I don’t really know either.”

 

“Well, don’t stress about it too much. We’re here for you. And call Jenna! I know you broke up, but she misses you.”

 

Tyler bit their lip. “I miss her too.” They spoke softly into the phone. 

 

“I'm going to let you go so you can get some sleep. I love you.”

 

“I love you too mom.”

 

——————

 

Tyler laid in their bunk, tracing circles on the ceiling. _I’m okay. Everything is okay._  They smiled to themselves as they drifted off to sleep.  


End file.
